Also I only had sexual relations to persons that I had a very close relation to anyway. I never had sex with more than one person at a time, so I would consider my sexual experiences as limited. To start a sexual relation with someone I think I need a lot of trust. I realize that sexuality is as everything else, by the way a thing that is influenced a lot by social systems and social changes.
Maybe because sexuality still is a taboo. But why? The role of sexuality, especially in the media discourse, it definitely changed as it actually is a subject more than a few decades ago. Also on a personal level I think that sexuality changed a lot.
The trendiness of different forms of sexuality and sexual behavior is, as I think, more than obvious, especially compared to the 50s or 60s. I believe that this can help people to openly live their sexuality without having to hide it. Still sexuality is treated as something very special.
I can see that it is something special for me, as it can be a manifestation of a close relationship to another person, and that is something special, of course. But having had sex with someone gives the relation a much stronger, much closer aspect, which also leads to the fact that it hurts much more to lose a friendship that also was a sexual one.
Again, this is only valid for me. Maybe it is interesting to ask ourselves why this is somehow the case for a lot of people. Do most people only want to have sexual relations with one person at a time? Why is that? Again, but why? I showed parts of what I wrote for this to a friend and she said that she would be afraid to get compared, especially when her partner would also have sex with a person that is also female.
What does this mean? Is sex a technique that can be compared? A sport? What do you want to compare? Number of orgasms? A strange and disgusting thought Maybe some people really do make comparisons in the ways I mentioned above and maybe this is an effect of the way sexuality is showed and discussed in mass media, and maybe lots of people are much more influenced by it than I think. I sometimes when I for some reason am optimistic tend to think that humans are more or less able to decide for themselves even though they are influenced by everything around them.
Things like this are really a great and actually pretty simple way to make a start. Communication is strength. Thank you. We had been robbed before; my roommates had already moved out and I was doing so too the very next day.
The men who broke in were living in the apartment underneath us and were aware of the situation. The attack lasted over 2 hours with the men leaving the apartment twice and coming back before I could get away.
I know I was raped both vagirially and orally I did not fight back, I froze. Trying to be aggressive in the beginning, it was apparent they were becoming way more violent and I had to stop. While they violated my physical being, my mind was somewhere else.
I have a few physical reminders of the attack, but most of the effects manifest themselves in interactions with other people, mostly men. For over a year I suppressed any sort of feelings I had about being raped. I kept myself intoxicated most of the time and was pretty promiscuous, eventually realizing I needed to slow down and deal with some of my problems. I have a hard time talking about the things that happened to me in an emotional way.
Sex is so difficult to talk about. I can talk about rape and abuse, these are familiar to me; sex is too, but much more confusing. I do like some parts, the more affectionate parts like kissing and cuddling, but when things start going too fast, emotions and hormones taking, over, somewhere in there I get scared.
I feel as though I no longer have any control and the situation is out of my hands. No matter how understanding my partner has been, I feel unable to speak up. As a feminist I have a lot of notions about sex and control.
I know I am in control of my body, my fate, but when I get myself into a sexual situation I am not enjoying, my partner unaware, I freeze.
Scared of the reaction? Fear of rejection, not wanting to disappoint my partner? Probably all of the above. My mind urges me to say something. I know. But like when I was raped, when things go too far for me my mind shuts off, my body remains. Rape is something often brought up within the pages of HeartattaCk as well as the punk scene in general. People are sick of hearing about it. Instead of talking about the causes and effects of rape, we point fingers and spread gossip. These problems have plagued me for four years.
I try to put up a strong front. By the sextraordinary, Danielle Arcidiacono. The topic of sex intrigues me. As some can attest to, I have been known to talk about it for hours and hours. Writing this column has brought me full circle to a lot of ideas I have been thinking about lately.
Last year, I did a lot of exploration and personal-interest research about sex and the sex industry. So much blew me away. There is so much out there, but why do so little of us talk about it and feel embarrassed by it?
Through self reflection, I also came to terms with my own sexuality. I may identify myself as mainly a heterosexual woman, but there is a lot more to my sexuality than that. My sexuality is defined by my experience, my desires, and how far I wish to make my fantasies a reality. Ever since I can remember, I have had an active imagination,' and as I grew older this worked itself into my sexual daydreams.
I have always fantasized about playing different characters, being in odd locations, or stepping into power roles. I like to call this sexual playing, and I am an advocate for exploring it to spice up your love life or add an extra thrill. In this issue that is devoted to sex, I wish to discuss sexual venues that are different than the basic vanilla world. Many people see these forms of sexuality as taboo, especially the latter. Therefore, I wish to add some clarification on the topics.
In order to understand different expressions of sexuality, we must understand that everyone holds different beliefs and values about sex, and none should be judged as wrong if they are different then what you hold.
Echoing the words of speaker and author, Peggy Sanday Reeves, I also believe that we are on the verge of a new sexual revolution. People are becoming more aware of safe sex and sexual assault issues. We are also discovering that people can explore their sexuality as long as it is consensual.
Sex for pleasure is part of our human drive. For most, sexual pleasure is generated by a variety of actions and sensations. Sometimes one partner may choose to be the more active participant; the person who instigates and directs a sexual act.
Even more so with this type of relationship, there has to be a greater growth of trust and communication between the partners. Many people hold stereotypes of the bdsm lifestyle and such relationships, saying that they are abusive and conform to gender stereotypes.
Upon closer look at the scene, one will notice that these stereotypes hold no ground. First of all, there is no gender specification for who is to be dominant or submissive. Furthermore, it is certainly not heterosexual based, it is shared by all. Many feminists believe that real sexual freedom implies freedom of choice.
One should be free to decide for oneself what kind of sexual activity affords the maximum of personal sensual pleasure. Nor does the bdsm scene entail an abuse of power. Submission can be a way to release yourself from your normal roles in society. In fact it is an exchange, an alternate way of looking at power.
You know, the more power you give away, the more power you must have! It also advocates safer sex and causing no meaningful damage on a submissive. It is up to the playing partners to communicate what aspects of bdsm that they are into. True for many involved in the lifestyle, the vanilla world of basic sexual relations does not interest them or is not enough for them.
Moreover, their relationships may transcend to other areas not just involving sex. It is a mutually agreed upon psychodrama in which the partners assume temporary fantasy roles that may also sometimes express a power dynamic. It is a way to confront taboos by making something that if real, would be horrifying. However, since it is a psychodrama, you can feel the erotic chill with the knowledge that the play will end and you will go back to your normal selves.
Role-playing is a great way to test your acting skills and to add spice to your sex lives. So go out there and explore your fantasies and desires. Your sexuality is a key part of what makes you unique. As long as your sexual playing is safe and consensual, there are countless ways to explore the naughty boy and girl within.
So challenge yourselves and talk more openly about sex. Share your fantasies with your partner, for you may be amazed to see that you share similar ones Different Loving. New York: Villard, H is cock is round in all aspects. Perfectly formed and smooth and round. Thick and strong, like the rest of him really. Average length, stocky, and shaped just right.
He likes me to take his pre-cum and rub it over and around the head of his cock with my thumb whilst we kiss. He takes forever to orgasm, and I adore sucking him for hours. He touches my face tenderly and stares into my eyes and I know that we are in love. The special characteristic of him is his softness. The skin on the head of his dick is the softest skin I have ever felt.
I adore taking his dick and rubbing the head back and forth, from side to side, on the part of my lower lip just inside my mouth where it is wet. I love the feel of that dick just there — the contradiction that something that hard can also feel so silkily soft. His prick has the same leanings as the boy above, which is ironic really. Almost the same in every dimension. Penises — they are funny things. Boys tend to think them ugly and are remarkably insecure about them.
I notice the angle, the shape, the skin, the hardness, the everything. But most of all I notice what they like and what I can do that makes them feel good. I get off on those three things, rather than the act in itself.
That when they take their cock and rub the head over my clitoris, and at the entrance to my cunt, I feel like I am going to explode. Boys talk about penis size and their insecurities all the time. What I mean is that there are so many more dimensions and dynamics to good sex than penis size. The best sex I have ever had was with someone with an average penis. About five inches, maybe five and a quarter.
Not particularly thick. Size was irrelevant. I have seen cocks that are three and a half inches when erect, and others eight inches. That old saying of them being all the same once erect even if they are big or small when flaccid is completely untrue. I nearly wrote about female masturbation, or something like that, but I then I decided that I would eventually write about what turns me on in the end. And this is what it comes down to — cocks turn me on.
I have no pretences of anything else. I am not saying that this is the stuff to change the world. Initially I was going to write on the positive aspects of masturbation. However, I decided to leave that for another time. Instead I wrote a poem, a short poem, while I was working at this shitty hole in the wall restaurant. It has to do with love and how it empowers you, how it catches you by surprise, and how vulnerable we all are as humans.
Love may be my greatest weakness just because when I face it, it can stare me down and make me either feel so incredibly positive or so unwittingly small. Love has a lot to do with the sexual world we live in which is why I wanted to include this in this issue of HaC. This is just one perspective on life and love and the clever situations we all become involved with.
From the moment of birth we are forced into a culture that attempts to define us according to its specifications: man or woman, heterosexual or homosexual, producer or consumer and so on. All of these categories deny human experiences and the variations within them. In reality, our lives constantly change. What is defined now as one thing can have completely different implications in another decade or country.
I do not fit into the heterosexual category so society and my thoughts plop me conveniently into the homosexual category.
That is like saying I was born with an unwanted affliction and assumes that it is necessary and even desirable to become heterosexual. Sexuality is not an innate orientation as most would believe, but rather a preference that in some way biologically may play a role in defining. Having said that I am still trapped. If I claim that being queer is a social construction I am to deny my body and biology.
However, if I acknowledge biology, my sexuality is defined from a determinist perspective. Is the struggle for queer rights any less valid if people choose their sexuality? We do not know what it means to choose heterosexuality. No one ever has to justify being straight or defend it as biological or chosen. In order for appreciation of queer sexuality, people need to recognize and explore the possibility that they are not heterosexual, and not necessarily homosexual, but a combination of both ends.
I do not want anyone to accept or tolerate queer sexuality. Tolerance and acceptance stigmatize being queer into a problem that needs to be tolerated or accepted. In the end, I am left in the dark drowning, searching for a reality. I have no answers, only questions and define myself in oppositional terms. Is it possible to have a positive and accurate queer identity in a society that is both heterosexist and homophobic? Is trying to do so only an attempt to conform to unacceptable social ideals?
Is it more important to break down heterosexuality rather than basing an identity on a notion of other? Is there such a thing as queer identity? The above writing is from a pamphlet I wrote for an art project and lately issues of sexuality and relationships have been running through my head constantly.
It is something I am continually struggling with and always searching for some sort of truth to apply to my life. It seems as though most of the time I find myself being attracted to other boys. I think about what exactly it is that attracts me to boys and I feel like an asshole for placing more value on one particular gender.
It always seems to come down to one thing. There is this certain dynamic that always seems to occur with groups of men. When men get together in groups they are these macho idiots who continually spout off their bigotry. When a woman enters the room or conversation the fuck potential suddenly expands and men suddenly turn into gentlemen. Women leave and comments about nice asses are sure to follow. I feel safe and protected when I walk down the street with women. Women are fighters and warriors, they have to be.
Women are forced into roles where it is essential to fight just to simply exist. I am not exactly sure where all of this gets me but I know that I am increasingly less comfortable with calling myself gay and more comfortable saying that I am queer.
The term queer is a lot more open and ambiguous. I like that. I need to stop limiting myself in terms of gender and relationships and work more towards seeking beauty in everyone. As always, I love to hear what people have to say or think so please get in touch, hopefully that is what this is about.
It is called Eightfold Path. Issue number five is out now. Take care. Yes, your emotions are nothing but politics! Society dictates the inner workings of all relationships on all levels— boss to worker, friend to friend, female to male, stranger to stranger.
All relationships should be examined and not blindly followed. I discovered the idea of revolutionary non- monogamy when studying the struggles of the Black Panther Party and the Weather Underground Organization. Due to the nature of this subject, I will give my personal account.
This is not because I think this is simply my subjective individual choice, but because it is what I know best. At first, Sue and I were hesitant to consider sexual actions outside our relationship. We thought to do so meant something was wrong between us and that surely one of us would get hurt. We proceeded slowly. I would not be hurt or, at least, I would try not to be. It was somewhat of a surprise when, with no warning, Sue actually did have sex with a guy she met at Mardi Gras.
As you can imagine, I was blown! They started playing together during the spring of , back then as a four set piece. All members comes from different bands such as Asylium, S. Detestation Grindcore , the Act and Cicatriz, among others… so the mix between both metal as well as punk and hardcore have been coming to us in a pretty natural way.
The lyrics, written in Swedish, mostly have a focus set on cynical and sarcasmfilled hate. D, DRI and Slayer. Great stuff! Excellent international compilation! Thanks Mysh! Stormcrow's sound of thunderous drums, galloping guitar rythms, intricate time patterns, and intensely dark vocals are sure to put them at the top ranks of crust and metal scenes.
The album art is done by Mid, guitarist and sometimes vocalist for Deviated Instinct. Link from Filestube! Up the punx!! The latest album from this fantastic Swedish band! So, let's keep this short. Swedish disdeath! Buy this album on Pulverised Records. Named after a town in California that the band grew up in, Rohnert Park showcases Ceremony at their finest as they mix influences like Black Flag, Circle Jerks, Fucked Up and The Stooges to present their best material yet.
Ceremony's trademark pissed off punk stomp is apparent on Rohnert Park and vocalist Ross Farrar's lyrics and delivery are as fiery as ever. Every second of it a modern reinterpreting of hardcore punk's most classic offenders. FUKPIG was originally conceived as a side project by members of the revered and now defunct, Mistress and then put on the backburner due to the success of both Mistress and Anaal Nathrakh. Drawing from a putrid pool of influences such as Extreme Noise Terror, Gorgoroth, Disgust and Mayhem, Fukpig mix up crust, punk, black metal and grind into an almighty mass of audio filth.
The album is a tirade against church, state and the surveillance society that we find ourselves living in. Dark, heavy, and crushing with reverbed vocals and heavy bass and driving guitars. This LP sounds more metallic, particularly the guitar parts, than their previous releases, but don't let that scare youit's still thrashy with that UK82 style.
A-side and are not afraid to play with tempo. The B-side is almost a whole piece with some rather metallic movements. The controlled chaos sounds like it could become a mess at any moment, and the tension is delicious! It's at times aggressive yet sad, and angry yet pretty.
Pretty vinyl! After a year spent sharing euro stages with some of the most active hardcore and punk bands around, Rise Above Dead are now ready to unleash "Human Disintegration", their first official ep recorded in April and only available on a 12"vinyl format. Heavy guitars and haunting vocals make the record sound like an electric funeral pyre. Definitely a must for fans of dark, metal tinged hardcore. Great debut guys! Are you ready for raw and noisy grinding Mince Core.
Expect nothing but raw, in your face, aggressive and no-bullshit Grindcore with fast-paced power chords and loads of blazing tempos. Formed in by the bass player Edoom Nuclear Winter, who called the drummer Tom Trash Crust to form a electro-darkindustrial 80 project in the same way as Alien Sex Fiend.
In they wanted to produce a music like swedish hardcore and english crust 80, the kind of music they like. This project became real when Gabi Crust Force vocals and Fred Maclarem guitar , joined the band and in a short time they recorded the first demo tape, called ''D-beat War 83''. Negative Approach is an American hardcore punk band, formed in Detroit, Michigan in The band is considered among of the Pioneers of hardcore punk and one of the crucial bands in the world's hardcore punk scene!
In original members of Negative Approach recently discovered several tracks in a basement in Detroit Mich. Now it is published!
Brutal Assault was founded in late , by four guys from Haifa, who were intrested in playing some rough, fast and thrashy Hardcore Punk, with songs which talk about the every day life, some happenings inside the punk scene, and other things that piss them off. Words Only. Rip Off The Rich. Time Does Not Heal. Another Day At The Office. Dinner Is Served. Sweet Revenge. One Inch To Far. Big Zombie 3. He Beat up His Boyfriend 4. One Horse Dub 5. Snow 6. Brutal 7. Building, The 8.
Prince of Darkness 9. A Dancing Master Such as Mr. Confess Poxy Lips Out in the Night Dancing in the Head Johnny Miner Insignificance This Sporting Life This collection spans their whole career in non-chronological order and includes tons of classics.
I've been a longtime fan of the Mekons and I've heard all their albums and some are just incredible but even I find it easier to just throw this in even though it's obviously missing some of my favorites.
They alternate between John Langford mostly and Sally Timms on vocals, and I gotta say I'm a huge Timms fan, when she comes in, believe me, the world shines a bit brighter. So, check out this great band for yourself because I'm not going to even try to describe their music.
Posted by Lord Kur at AM 2 comments. Posted by swampchode at AM 0 comments. Awakenings 2. Song of Mourning and Woe 3. Of Beasts and Blossoms 4. Solitude Assembly 5. Deconstruction 6. Over Green Misty Hills Final Slumber Total playing time I just got a huge shipment of Njiqahdda albums in the mail because I love them so much. They usually play droning, experimental black metal but on this release they go for the all acoustic approach and just like everything else they do, this style comes out incredible.
This is for those quiet Sunday mornings while you are sipping coffee and contemplating your next bong hit. At first I just thought this was going to be something I only play occasionally because the style really isn't my thing, but this is just addictive and beautiful. Check it out. Posted by Lord Kur at PM 3 comments.
Wednesday, July 7, Mange - Disillusioned Disillusioned Genre - Sludge Origin - N. Hollywood, Ca. Time - min. Since The little I had heard from this band in no way hinted to how intense this shiny platter was going to be. Ruthless sludge-violence played with all the discordant ugliness this trio of hardcore heavyweights could muster.
Their harsh dirge counterpoised by pummeling bursts of grinding speed kept me slightly off balance through the first listen because I wasn't quite sure what to expect next; which is a good thing in my book. Nothing is more boring than a predictable album. Subsequent listens allowed me to enjoy the crushing density of the noise that could almost be called complex. Sick dual vocals add to the strength of the delivery and give it a cool grindcore edge.
Follow 2. Again I See 3. Fallen Depart 4. Wealth Of Ignorance 5. I picked this up from the band when they played the Gilman St. If my memory is correct Morgion was also on the bill, although things tend to get a little fuzzy from time to time. Check It!
Tuesday, July 6, Russian Circles - Geneva Fathom — 2. Geneva — 3. Melee — 4. Hexed All — 5. Malko — 6. When the Mountain Comes to Muhammad — 7. Philos — Total Playing Time: Completely engaging, beautiful and mesmerizing 3rd studio full length from these Chicago instrumental post rockers, this one shouldn't be overlooked.
The lack of vocals won't be missed at all since these guys have a lot going on musically to keep a high level of interest. Posted by Lord Kur at PM 2 comments. Lucky Guy 2. Saying Goodbye 3. Everywhere I Go 4. Better Than Me 5. From Your Girl 6. Not Like Me 7. Baby Go Round 8. North Pole 9. Big Mouth Every Single Thing Don't Waste Another Day Stupid Jerk Another Day Eye To Eye I Need You All For Nothing Total Playing Time: This is the Muffs glorious debut album and it is one hell of a catchy and fun pop punk masterpiece.
I honestly haven't gotten bored of this albumn since it first came out. You know you'll love it. The Muffs. Newer Posts Older Posts Home. Subscribe to: Posts Atom. Nola and more Core of Destruction. Remember, if you like it, BUY it!! Many not all of the BM crew started taking themselves way too seriously and forgot about all the fun, the reason why they should have been there in the first place.
I think that some really good BM evolved out of all the trash that flooded the market around that time though but I was never really a fan of the genre. Not brutal enough I say, I like always liked it deep, dark, guttural and gory.
What are some of the rarest and most prized possessions you own, metal related or otherwise? When I was right into the whole tape trading thing I used to write to a lot of bands and get all sorts of shit sent my way.
I had merch personally sent to me from Entombed, Amorphis, Grave. OLD and a host of other bands. It was always like a bit of a competition in the Melbourne metal scene as to who had the rarest shirt. Pretty funny stuff when you see most people doing the opposite in other scenes. My real prized collectable stuff was always my horror movie poster collection and horror film models that I made. Do you still draw often? Did you ever do artwork for other bands? Thanks for that.
Yeah, as well as watching horror, writing about horror, singing about horror and reading horror I used to like to draw a lot of horror too. Can you tell that I went to a private Catholic school? Does it really show? Ha ha ha. Apart from doing cover art, gig flyers and what ever else was required for us I also did a shirt for Melbourne band Disembowelment.
Is that true?! You must have some other hilariously sick or macabre stories that you could tell. Posted a turd to The States ya reckon? Hilariously sick macabre stories? Alright mate, thanks a lot for answering these questions! Any last words? I can only imagine that a few people would say something along these lines but that is undoubtedly the best bunch of questions I have ever been asked in an interview in my entire musical career.
Thanks very much and best of luck with the mag. After 3 years 6ft under. First off, The Kill have already split up 3x, so what do we have to get rid of you guys for good? Why did The Kill get started again? Ok, well for your information woman, The Kill split twice. It would be stupid to grind under a different name. Can you give us a brief history of the band so far? Whats the actual lineup now? After the last breakup, you auditioned drummers from as far away as the Blue Mountains, Did you ever get any people seriously wanting to try out from overseas?
He tragically passed on a little while back. Jordan Overlunde R. I doubt anyone was really ever serious. Will Neil have any involvement in this reunion? I doubt it, though it would be a good idea to see if he wanted to scream a few abusive lines the next time we record.
Neil wrote your previous lyrics. Are you including lyrics in the new material? Are you gonna rip off aWhitesnake song this time around? On the last recording we both did vokills in many tracks with lyrics already written.
But if we had to come up with the lyrics for these new songs, The Kill would have been delayed for another 5 years!
As for using GNR lyrics back then, well that was just a thing we thought was funny at the time. But I doubt that would ever happen again, unless we become desperate.
What other projects have you guys been doing while The Kill has been out action? Kilda once a week. Of course, they are a little different, but he will still recognize them once they are recorded. I would love to do something with Christoph some day.
Jay has sacrificed heaps of his TV time for The Kill this year. But still… He is a fucking lazy cunt! Any favourite local bands? When I did get out last, Die Pigeon Die took me by surprise. Do you feel any pressure as the main songwriter to live up to the old tunes? At one stage yeah! What are your personal influences? Favourite albums of all time? BAF grindcore is a small label I do on the side with my spare time.
I try to only stock blast material! But the idea has offended a few people over the years when working out trades. Maybe one day soon. Who also sound a little like Assuck with Terrorizer style vokills.. Killer fucking band! Pretty much organised another Noisear Blastasfuk release straight away.
Thanks to Christoph who showed me their demo knowing I would die on my arse. True Brazilian Kings! A while back there were whispers of an Openwound reunion, or at least playing a couple of shows. Is there any truth to that?
If so, Is this still likely to happen? Maybe… That all depends of Fab! When do you guys expect to be ready to play live shows? Have you got any special plans for your first show back? Plus we have a few booked early next year. Will The Kill eventually go overseas?
Are you gonna play Obscene someday or what? Maybe not! We need to record more first I think. Does it differ from the old stuff? Are you consciously trying to write in the same style as before?? I managed to talk Jay out of using those fucking dbl pedals not too long ago.
There for we will now stay a Single Pedal Metal unit.delivers mostly egregious DEATH METAL horrors and utmost seething GRINDCORE decimation, but also a sheaf of THRASH METAL outbursts, HARDCORE kicks, grottiest reeking D-BEAT punkfucks as well as distraughtly uproarious NOISECORE hullabaloos. worldwide fucking frenzy and seizure.